My Website

Dating & relationship advice from Kate and Jason.

Posts categorized Dating

post

She Already Dumped You. Forget Her…

Greetings beloved readers!

I just ran into an ex while I was visiting Moanalua Gardens Park.  She’officially an ex now but there was a time she dumped me after which I won her back; at least for some time.  The final time we parted it was a mutual decision; Lisa and I realized that we were really incompatible.  Because of that, our chance meeting and resulting conversation was pleasant.  It brought back only good memories.  My past with Lisa proved that getting dumped does not mean the end of your relationship is final.

She Already Dumped You. Forget Her…

Love may be lovelier the second time around, but getting there may not exactly be as easy.

Getting back with your ex-girlfriend is one huge decision that comes with even bigger requirements the moment you take it. It is twice, thrice, maybe even four or five times more difficult than winning her the first time around. This time you have a history. And while at some point it may be to your advantage, it is an obstacle most of the time. It will not be easy to woo her [6] this time around.

That is why you have to work harder and plan your dates more thoroughly. How you execute every date this time around will matter more than it did in the past. So where you take her to and what you do at every date will make or break your second chance at love.

Want her back?

After learning how to ask a woman out – advice from Sonic Seduction. Here are your best date options for winning your ex-girlfriend:

Relive your first meeting, first date, or any significant firsts the last time you were together. Man, you have history. You had better use that to your advantage! Use your good memories together, the ones that would conjure up the most poignant, Hallmark channel kind of stories that you shared. Tap into her emotion – remind her why she loved you the first time. Of course, get to work to make it more memorable for her this time around. You can view this article also by Examiner.com.

Use all of her old favorites. You should know all these, so by all means use them to your advantage. Make her realize that you still treasure memories of her, that she matters enough for you to remember the little details about her. She may not mention it but trust me; she will notice it and it can only translate to plus points on the scoreboard for you.

Go the extreme lengths to win her back. Just as there were reasons she once loved you, she must also have had reasons to break up with you. And that’s something you’d like to push aside into the most inaccessible portions of your mind. Try to make your efforts to get back together bigger than the reason for the past breakup. Rent an ad space, have someone serenade her, or fill her bedroom with roses – you name it. Find something that will make her jaws drop and make her forget about and regret why she broke up with in the first place. Apart from that, you are also sending her the right message: you are a much better person now than the last time.

Two things that can help you make that elusive reconciliation happen: creativity and good memories. But you have to realize that your history with each other is a double edged sword; it can work for you in some instances, and the opposite in others.

And best of all, to pull this one off successfully, here are two things that you should never forget: (1) don’t bring up old fights and (2) don’t forget to apologize for what happened in the past.

Also read How to Get a Second Date after a Bad First One for a more effective reconcilation. Good luck!

Sincerely,
Rob

Need more ideas to boost your chances at reconciliation?  Buy our book: “We Are Each Other: The Kate & Jason’s Guide To Everlasting Love”; go here: http://weareeachother.com/now-available-we-are-each-other-volume-1/

Posted on 2nd October 2013 in Dating, Dating Tips, Love, Relationships  •  Comments are off for this post
post

Bad First Date? Remedy Is Here…

Greetings Everyone! After my first blog post, I just want to help everybody who asked me, “What could happen after a bad first date?”  Well, read on to the end and try your best to earn a second chance!

I was not born great at dating; I don’t think anybody is!  I have horrible memories of some of my first few attempts at dating back in high school, and even in my freshman year at the University of Wisconsin – Madison.  One of these disasters I remember clearly to this day.  I went out with Cathy, one of the hottest freshmen at the time.  We were at dinner when she mentioned that she loved having dates at that place because her ex worked there – she was using me, and other males as well, to spite her ex!  I never did ask her out again after that.

What do you do after a bad first date? Run away? Change address and hide forever? Move on and get a new date with someone else? Sure, that’s what most men would do. But would you ever consider trying to get a second date?

It sounds ridiculous, of course. After all, no one would be crazy enough to give himself a second dose of rejection, let alone humiliation. That’s ego suicide!

But then again, why not? Everyone deserves a second chance at everything so why should you not give it a second try? Use this chance to give her a better second impression – something that’s good enough to make her forget the bad first impression you gave her. And besides, you may never meet a girl as special as she is. Just think about all the possibilities if you make it past the second date successfully!

Don’t waste your second chance!

Sure there are tons of things to get worried about. You may have failed so horribly on the first one that she might actually think of you as a joke. You may have failed so horribly she might not even answer your call! But then again, it might not have been that bad at all and maybe your fears are just making it seem so horrible.

Convinced about getting a second try? Great! Read this SIBG.com blog post on flirting or this article from Evan Marckatz. Okay! Be ready, here’s what you can do:

Plan an interesting invite. If you’ve botched the first dinner date, don’t expect her to still want to go out to dinner with you. In fact, don’t try to invite her to do anything that’s practically the same thing you did on the first date. It won’t be interesting and it would bring back bad first date memories. If you want to make a new impression, try out something new. Try something that she cannot say ‘no’ to, like a concert, a house party, or something that would strike her fancy. (Hopefully, you’ve talked and listened well enough on your first date to know her interests).

Don’t go for the call – she might just not answer it. Go for a text – it’s much safer plus you’re likely to let her in on your second date plans. You could tell her your plans even before she could say no, or even before your own fear and awkwardness takes you over. Carefully plan how and what to say to convince her to give it a second try;   use an emoticon or two to keep things light and easygoing.

Speak of easygoing; don’t make a big fuss of things. One, don’t call the ‘second date’ a ‘date’ – it will make her defensive and remind her about the first one. Second, don’t talk about the first date; don’t even mention it if possible (unless you did something that requires an apology). Don’t be too pushy either. She will think you’re desperately trying to get her to like you even after your horrible first date. That might be your intention but you can always be subtle about it!

Make sure you’d be your best self ever. Not everyone gets a second chance especially at dating so go ahead and make the most out of this. This might be your one big date and she might be the love of your life. Be your best self while at it baby!

For additional information and questions, email me at info@weareeachother.com.

For more relationships tips buy our book: “We Are Each Other: The Kate & Jason’s Guide To Everlasting Love”; go here: http://weareeachother.com/now-available-we-are-each-other-volume-1/

Posted on 2nd October 2013 in Dating, Dating Tips, Love, Relationships  •  Comments are off for this post
post

Are You Up Shit Creek? Here’s What You Need To Know To Salvage Shit!

As my first post, I would like to help everyone who thinks misunderstandings are causing their relationships to go off track.

Do you know that I’ve gone through lots of relationships crises that you can almost consider me an expert in them?  Yes, it’s true.  Even my thriving and ever blooming relationship with the love of my life, Kate, had its low moments.  Perhaps the lowest was about a year back when we both fell prey to excessive familiarity.  The way we interacted with each other became so routine it almost killed off all the sparks of love we had for each other.  But we faced the problem head on and made a commitment to set aside time for us to be alone with each other – not necessarily on a full-blown date but just time set aside solely for us to be together.  We also pledged to be more demonstrative and vocal about our love for each other. It worked like a charm!

Every relationship has its ups and downs. It is not always about rainbows and butterflies; it is never a 365-day honeymoon period. But sometimes, some of these bad days are worse than others. And these are the times that put the relationship to the test.

When these times comes you have only two choices: fight or flight. You either quit and leave the relationship and your ladylove, or make an effort to save it.

5 simple techniques that you should know!

If you are experiencing these down times in your relationship, and you so badly want to keep it and keep your girlfriend, these 5 simple techniques might just be all you need to save your ailing relationship; these might be the exact same things that your girlfriend has so long been waiting from you:

Treat her in a more special and loving way. Treat her like she deserves – as the woman you love, and the only one that matters to you. You might have become so familiar with each other that your behavior becomes common, routine, and borderline boring. Go back to the days when you have just started dating, when you were still trying to win her. She would enjoy feeling the same love and attention you gave her in the past. It does not need to be anything grandiose and lavish; it could be as simple as holding her hands in public, helping her with the door, kissing her more frequently, etc.

Go out on dates regularly. You don’t need a special occasion to spend quality time together. Go someplace romantic, do something memorable, and do it as frequently as possible.  Don’t make it plain and routine, that’d make it boring and defeat its purpose. Again, it does not have to be grandiose – just special. And on these moments, don’t let anything distract you. This is your special moment; always savor it, prepare for it, and make her look forward to it. Visit SIBG for tips and techniques that will run your date perfectly!

Don’t fall asleep mad at each other. This is the secret of the longest lasting relationships I know. Before you go to bed, make sure you’ve resolved your differences and that you’ve made peace with each other. An argument that goes overnight is a bad thought to wake up to and ruins your entire day. Moreover, it gets you used to a hostile environment and that’s never a good thing for a relationship.

Always keep your communication lines wide open. Some couples have this bad habit of not talking to each other when they are mad. Some men just shut up when they are angry or during a confrontation; ironically, it is this frustrating silence which causes  women to actually nag more. These habits are bad. Always, always talk with each other no matter how angry you are. Talk normally even when you have not made peace yet – don’t make silence a habit that comes with every argument. And always keep your communication open and comfortable.

Always tell each other ‘I love you’. Remind yourself that you are in love; that you are in the relationship because you love her. And you have to remind yourself that so it channels in your actions towards her. And don’t forget to actually tell her that. Say it even when you’re mad, bored, or tired. Say it as often as you can to remind her why you should remain in a relationship with each other.

Read this article from Health.howstuffworks.com for more details.

If you have any concerns, please do message me at info@weareeachother.com.

If you need more tips, Kate and I have written a guide to everlasting love! Buy our book: “We Are Each Other: The Kate & Jason’s Guide To Everlasting Love”; go here: http://weareeachother.com/now-available-we-are-each-other-volume-1/

Posted on 30th September 2013 in Dating, Dating Tips, Love, Relationships  •  Comments are off for this post
post

Aaron Embry… Guest Boyfriend?

Hello Everyone~!

I ran across my old friend Jim yesterday at the mall. We are still the best of friends although there was a time when that friendship was tested almost to the limits.  That was when, for a very short time, I fell for his ex.  Though Jim had parted with Lynn six months before I made my move, there were still lots of awkwardness to say the least.  Good thing I cleared everything with Jim before making my move.  That thoughtfulness may have saved our friendship.  Well that was five years ago, but there are times when I still feel a bit awkward around Jim.

Aaron Embry once said that we can never dictate our hearts who to fall in love with. After all, the ‘heart has reasons that reason itself does not know’. But what if you fall in love with the person that your bestest buddy ever once fell in love with? What basic etiquettes apply when you fall for your best friend’s former girl? Should you let love rule over you or should the bro come before the lady?

Pros vs Cons of Falling for Your Best Friend’s Girl

So while technically she is single and unattached, given that she’s your best buddy’s ‘ex’, the fact still remains that she once dated him and that they will always have a connection that all former lovers have. And that’s what brings all the awkwardness in the world! (Or in your world at least).

And the awkward, I mean, really really awkward part is just the beginning of it. There will always be a question about how your best friend is likely to take it and whether you can give up one for the other. Not to mention, you’re going to get some awkward and telling conversations with the rest of your circle of friends.

Maybe, too, you cannot help but question the intention of the ‘ex’ as far as sincerity is concerned. Is she dating you because she wants to really date you, or is she simply using you to to get back at her ex aka your best friend?

In this complicated dating situation, it would literally be easier to find the proverbial needle in the haystack than to see a good reason to proceed. Testing your best friendship, maybe?

If you’ve got time, here are some online dating tips every man must know (courtesy of PUADatabase.com). You may want to also read this article from Huffington Post.com. :)

What to Do When You Are in This Situation

Should you find yourself in this very awkward situation, might as well do it the right way and try to do as little damage as possible – to your friendship, to your date, and to yourself most importantly. Here are some tips:

Ask your best friend’s opinion and permission on the matter. In the name of great friendship and civility, you have to take this extra step. Don’t be the guy who stabs his best friend in the back. Even when they are technically not together, you have a moral obligation to do so simply because they did have a relationship, [16] and you are supposed to be best friends.

Figure out her intentions. Is she really interested in you or is she just doing it to spite your buddy? You have to be really careful and conscious about this part simply because (1) you don’t want to be duped, and (2) you don’t want to be the accomplice to a crime towards your best, best buddy!

Avoid mentioning the ex to your best friend and vice versa. Not until you guys have totally gone past the awkward stage can you put the two in the same sentence. Same rule applies to when you have to ask both of them to be in the same room!

Yes, it sure is challenging so better think more than twice before getting into this messy, sticky situation! (And she had better be worth it!)

Perhaps you have more dating and relationships questions?  Buy our book: “We Are Each Other: The Kate & Jason’s Guide To Everlasting Love”; go here: http://weareeachother.com/now-available-we-are-each-other-volume-1/

Posted on 22nd January 2013 in Dating  •  Comments are off for this post